How to Approach a Woman at the Gym?
The gym is a tricky place to approach a women. Most women there are trying to get a serious workout and meeting guys is the last thing on their mind. Many women wear headphones just so guys will not bother them at the gym.
Here are some tips on how to approach women at the gym.
Make eye contact with girls you find attractive. If she gives you eye contact or more open/positive body language, try to catch her before or after her workout.
Guys here a tip, make the conversation fun, flirty and witty. I would not recommend commenting on her physique right off the bat.
You can let her know, she caught your eye and you had to see what she was about.
After speaking to her, find out if she is worthy of your time. Does she have more going for her, than her looks or her body? Can you she carries on a conversation? If not, you will be carrying the conversation and you will be bored in a few minutes.
Once you have qualified her, I recommend a drink or coffee for the first outing. Tell her it will be quick. Ladies don’t want to be trapped for an extended amount of time with a guy they don’t really know.
I leave you with a quote from a women who was approached at the gym.
Unfortunately the headphone thing doesn’t always work. The other night at the gym, this guy asks me for a spot, he made sure to mention he was a semi-pro football player. I had my headphones on, in my zone, working biceps. He’s using 150lb dumbells (weigh more than I do each!!). I’m like okay sure, mr. jock. There are about 20 guys standing around that he could have asked, mind you. He’s working chest and so I’m used to spotting and just pushing up on the elbow a little if he needs help. So after the first set, he says push up on the weights, well his last set, he decides he can do 7 reps, when he should have stayed at 6. He almost dropped them on his head because for one, he didn’t have anything left and #2 I am not used to spotting that heavy and having to lift all the weight myself. I was PISSED!!!!! That’s a good way to not pick up a girl. Then last night some idiot asked me if I wanted to do biceps with him. I had been working legs the whole time. Okay, sure, I’ll just quit doing my leg workout so I can do biceps with you!!!! (sarcasm) WTF!!! Idiot.
Girls that are serious about working out don’t want to be hit on in the middle of their workout. On a positive note. If you offer a hi, how are you and say, if you ever need a spot, let me know. That’s fine. From then, take it slow at the gym. Just say hi, how are you doing for a while until she feels comfortable with you. Then catch her before her workout if possible and make small talk. It’s not usually a quick thing at the gym, from my experience. Most of the time I just get creeped out. In my gym the weight room is on one floor and cardio and is on another floor. I am usually the only woman in the weight room so it makes it really hard.
Come back and leave us a comment if you find these tips on how to approach women helpful.
March 11th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
Old post but I’ve been hit on at the gym and it’s so annoying that at times, I’ve felt violent. The women that want to be hit on are the ones in the lycra jumpsuits proudly displaying their navel piercings. Not the serious women in sweats, shorts & tees. I’ll “third” the headphones signal. If we’re wearing head/earphones – leave us alone. I’ll even wear all my ipod gear when the battery has run out with no music just to avoid unwanted conversation, attention or what not. Seriously – the gym is never a place to pick up a woman – bad dating advice if you ask me. I’d also like to point out that it’s even worse if the guy is a crusty old perv thinking he’s going to hook up with some sweet young thing young enough to be his daughter or granddaughter even. Ick. <> It give me nightmares.
September 13th, 2009 at 11:00 am
Well, if you women wear those sexy clothes, then there is no reason why guys go after you. If you’re going to go workout at the gym, wear something ugly but comfortable, that will tell the guys that you are there to workout.
If you’re gonna wear tight tank tops, booty shorts, what does that tell you? Ask your self, why do you wear that? TO BE SEEN!
50% of the people in the gym these days are posers. The other half are there for a hard workout. One way you can tell is that the people who are posers, they always look around at people and sometimes wear sunglasses in the gym. People who are doing cardio or weight lifting don’t make any eye contact.
October 4th, 2009 at 9:38 am
I dont agree with Mr Death Itself, cos there is no such person who goes to the gym, whether he is a poser or serious, that does not look around and about. Cos if you are able to go through a whole gym session without looking or realizing anyone else in the gym, you have a serious social disorder of some kind.
And how to differentiate posers from the real ones is quite easy. But easy for those who take gym seriously like myself. And even i like to check out girls at the gym, provided that there are any, cos i have only come across such situations a handful of times.
April 19th, 2010 at 4:01 pm
I’m a guy who focuses at the gym on what I’m doing. Several times I’ve had women hitting on me, although they do it in a very different way than those obvious ways that some of the guys mention do. They get your attention and then use all kinds of psychological subtle tests to form an opinion for themselves.
I had one very attractive woman watching me doing lunges with weights, she came onto me asking how I managed to keep my balance! I told her that I focused on what I was doing instead of anyone else in the gym. She then asked if I ever trained with anyone! I asked her why she was asking, she said that she didn’t like training alone and needed someone to inspire her. So I handed her my card and said get in touch and told her that she could buy me dinner after the first session, but I chose the place and food, and see how it goes from there – then told her that I needed to get on with my training. I could not believe it when she came over again and asked me if I fancy her… I told her that just because she had an attractive exterior it didn’t get her any credit with me that she kept causing me to lose focus.
I had the same problem coming into the gym as well. The woman serving was attractive wearing this black shiny satin number with orange blob shaped patterns on it. Two guys in front of me were hitting on her and it was so annoying hearing them tell her how attractive she looked and her lapping it all up! I leaned over and looked her up and down and said she looked like a lava lamp and handed her my membership card. It was clearly the wrong thing to say because she now focused all of her attention on me and started flirting back…
It seems to me that when wussy guys suck up to women they get nowhere, but when we are not that interest we are seen as playing hard to get, especially if we bust on her with some comment that is different.
I’m not sure why these guys want to approach you at the gym, but if you really are not interested then be polite and say so without hurting their feelings, don’t do all of this tactical trickery like iPod, learn to communicate and be polite.
August 11th, 2010 at 11:08 am
I have started going to this gym, and I know is not quite the best place to pick up girls there (specially cause the hot ones might have a bf already lol)however it happened that I saw a girl that just left me stunt for many reasons, well could be one specific, that is that after a move Australia, a long way from home I happened to see this girl on friday at the gym who looks exactly like my ex-fiance who I loved so much. I just i know now she goes to that that boddy attack class and leaves and I am really dying to talk to her to see hoe she is like. Plues she is very cute, and I only see her on fridays, so once a week and this has be the second time, what it the recomendation here?
August 11th, 2010 at 8:03 pm
@Hector – I would try and speak to her on her way out of the gym. Open things up with something like: “hiya, my name is Hector, I recently moved here and I am looking to meet some cool people.” See where that takes you and always ask for her number.
August 11th, 2010 at 10:17 pm
The woman I kinda dated off and on for 3.5 years is now dating a real douchbag who is always at my gym, with her… fun fun… and now all the guys there are into the MMA crap, it’s all I hear… this combo makes it extremely hard to focus, need to ressurrect the ole Ipod.