What Women Find Attractive in Men?
What Women find attractive in Men?
Every women has their list of qualities that attract them to men. From my research, these are some of the qualities I think women find most attractive in men.
Attributes Which Women Find Attractive in Men:
A. Self Confidence
B. Sense of humor
C. Intelligence
D. Status
E. Style
F. Exciting
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We live in a very complicated world compared to our ancestors of 1.5 million years ago. Some things change but what women find attractive in men, has not changed much. On a primal level, women are attracted to men for their superior survival and replication genes. Women want to insure offspring will have the best chance at survival. For it is through replication and survival that society can move forward.
Self Confidence – I feel this is one of the most important qualities to posses in life. Women are masters at reading body language. If you are not self confident your body language, will radiate your inner insecurities. You will not make a good first impression unless you are walking tall and negotiating social situations with confidence and poise.
Senses of humor – Ladies want to be around guys who are fun and adventurous. Being funny will leave a big impression on her. It also demonstrates you are comfortable with who you are and you are not afraid of a little self effacing humor.
Intelligence – Women find it very attractive when a man is an expert or knowledgeable in a particular field. Women enjoy talking about sociological and world issues and you will be ahead of the game if you can speak eloquently about a broad range of topics. Emotional intelligence is of particular importance. You must understand and be able to calibrate to someone’s emotional state in-order to communicate effectively.
Status – I believe women are hard wired through evolution; to be attracted to leaders and men in positions of power. These men would rank high because of the superior resources and ability to survive. Think back to high school, the quarterback and team captains usually had the pick of the females. These lads were early leaders and perceived to be of higher social value.
Style – Most guys fail here miserably. Guys have you ever thought about how meticulous women are about their appearance? They will go shopping for three hours for the perfect outfit and shoes. They will then spend 2.5 hours getting ready for a night out. So that is a total of 5.5 hours of preparation for one night out. Compare that to your 20 minute of preparation and I think you get the point. You should have at least a couple nice outfits that are clean and fit you well. You should stay up-to-date with the current styles by reading fashion magazines like GQ, Details and the like.
Exciting – Life tends to get monotonous at times. Women are drawn towards men who charismatic and exciting. Every person is unique and exciting. Find out what is unique about yourself and share your experiences with people. Surprise your lady! Tell her you are taking her away for the weekend but don’t tell her where. Of course, she will need some general packing instructions but the mystery will score big points for you. You are a man, be impulsive!!! Lastly, don’t be predictable.
You can not accomplish all these aspects of your life overnight. Think of this a journey and not a destination. It is very helpful to watch movies to envision the qualities of a attractive men. Watch movies staring Sean Connery, Gary Cooper, John Wayne, and Brad Pitt. I think the James Bond character is a prime example of what women find attractive in men.
We hope you have enjoyed this article about what women find attractive in men.
December 14th, 2006 at 7:52 pm
those are qualities i def. agree with, maybe not in that order but good ones :]
January 2nd, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Alpha males attract women; men with money, muscle, intelligence, ECT…. It’s prehistoric. They are attracted to “saftey” so they will have the oppurtunity to reproduce, since reproducing is any speicies first instinctive purpose.
January 2nd, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Love your view and understanding of what women find attractive in men.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:02 am
it was a good piece of article…well if two men have exactly the same qualities as that described above whom will the woman then go to??
May 9th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
@Ahmed – No two people are exactly the same. The women will usually pick the guy who makes her feel same. She also likes the guy who is fun and makes her laugh.
June 1st, 2008 at 8:02 am
Well,i am a woman,personally i dnt care how a guy dresses,if i am impressed with how u r then dats enough,i wudnt give a damn about wat other pipo wil think,coz u wont b dating them,just as long as u put a smile on my face and u smell good and put on nyc shoes,lol.
June 9th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
LOL ^^^ Sophy has good advice just to tell you guys girls arent all organized by category of course sharpening these attributes does work but polishing each of these skills will make you too much for many girls and taht leads to a place where you probably didnt intend on going. BUT this works this is great and i believe that people will mistake self confidence with pride be sure that its not pride but self confidence that you have pride is good too but too much pride WILL hurt you =D
August 2nd, 2008 at 2:18 am
Totally agree with everything in the article. Good point about fashion, keeping up to date with styles. I think that how men behave around women stems back to confidence. Men can have a sense of humor and have high Intelligence, but if confidence is low, it will reflect in the body language, demenour and conversation.
A lack of confidence comes from in experience and lack of knowledge.
A. Self Confidence
B. Sense of humor
C. Intelligence
D. Status
E. Style
F. Exciting
August 21st, 2008 at 2:17 pm
This post was interesting. I know that as a woman, I’m definately into a man who is sure of himself but not arrogant. If a man can look me in the eye almost non stop in bed, that says a lot about him. Nothing worse than someone using you as a sperm receptical…Nature is a funny thing!
August 24th, 2008 at 11:58 am
I’m kinda shy chick but quiet picky. I like guys who I can feel confortable & be myself with. Shy, cheeky guys are more up my alley, than the in your face predatory types. Lol!
September 18th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Interesting article. I think I agree with it. As a guy and a trainer, I have to be quite confident in my class. And yes, I do get chicks in my class falling for me. I have to be confident, but in no sense arrogant, a trainer can’t be. I have to tend to the needs of the students, so no arrogance will work, but have to be confident with my answers. And Humor, for sure, other wise the whole 4 hours training gets boring. And so BINGO! My girl students come over to chat with me, take that chance to casually touch me and so on. But it is my profession and so I am don’t go further than that. So this article is very true.
November 29th, 2008 at 6:19 am
well self confidence and myself have slowly begun to cooperate. i’ll tell you all right off that i’m a shy person. whenever i’m near some girls i find attractive i never know what to say. with my shyness i hardly ever tell or show anyone what i’m really capable of. one of the things i think i’ve accomplished in my life is to be a second degree blackbelt in tae kwon do, holding one golden and two silver medals from tournaments. there, i’ve leaked out some things about myself. idk what girl would like me
December 19th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
Hi people
As newly registered user i just want to say hello to everyone else who uses this forum
March 9th, 2009 at 4:43 am
Here’s the irony. Self-confidence may seem like a great trait, but the only thing it is really great for is convincing people. Its attractive because men who seem the most convincing in their attitudes/beliefs have convinced the most ladies in the past, and thus reproduced the most spreading their genes more. However, self-confidence is not a positive trait if it is thoroughly investigated. It creates attachment to false beliefs. I suppose if you just want to convince people, its great. but if you want truth, You need to be skeptical and open minded to everything. My conclusion: act self-confident- don’t be it.
I think this is the case with many of those traits (not intelligence). I would add competitive/aggressive to the list. Women have the most backwards wiring ever, yet we are forced to be subjected to it in the modern world, so you have to comply.
March 10th, 2009 at 11:20 am
Come on. I hear this all the time. Girls are attracted to guys who are hot. Sure, if the hot guy has no personality, they will not keep them, but when somebody says somebody is attractive, they are not talking about a guy with a sense of humor, or confidence. Brad Pitt (or whoever is hot) would pull a woman over a Dane Cook. That is a fact. Handsome men and women rule the roost. It is true that confident men do get women, but not over a hot guy. I am sorry, but you have to like what your looking at. Period.
March 17th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Similiar psychologies attract each other. Therefore, confident men attract confident women. Men with low selfesteem attract low self esteem women. Because if the psychologies are too different, one won’t be able to tolerate the other. A confident man would find an insecure woman needy and weak, total burden. A confident woman would find an insecure man a loser. Insecure men or women would feel inadequate around confident others. Therefore, you basically date or marry somebody very close to your self esteem level. If your partner is a loser, he she is really a reflection of you
April 1st, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Hey Sage, question for you and for the board for that matter (women included). So 3 or 4 times a week I see this girl at the gym I go to (on and off for past 8 months I’d say) – she’s usually finishing her workout as I’m starting mine so there’s probably only a 10-15 minute window when we’re both there. I found her attactive, and also found that we usually made eye contact at least once everytime we were there at the same time. I’ve only recently been making it a point (past month or two) to look more in her direction – and I feel she might be doing the same (wishful thinking). She seems pretty serious with her workouts (ipod, headphones, etc.) so I don’t want to bother her during her gym time, but was thinking of just approaching her as she is leaving the gym and just saying something like “Hey, I’m so-and-so, just see you here alot and wanted to say hi” and leave it at that – so it at least opens the door for convos in the future. Think this is a good approach? Thanks!
April 1st, 2009 at 3:58 pm
Hiya Tom – we got that topic covered here, http://www.thesage-speaks.com/how-to-approach-a-woman-at-the-gym/
July 20th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Well after reading this article im a living testimonial, the A-F points have helped me numerous times. I also find honesty is a good part. Also be yourself. Don’t try to be somebody your not, what do you gain from it if you want to get the girl and she finds out you a fraud/liar. Best of Luck People
August 6th, 2009 at 7:10 am
Kamal – I agree with you 100 percent.
A. Self Confidence
B. Sense of humor
C. Intelligence
D. Status
E. Style
F. Exciting
Looks, are part of the game. But, they are not essential.
Most not all women, primarily look for the ALPHA male with all or 90 % of the key qualities above.
I hold A.S, and B.S in business and I.T. I have no problems getting women and I am not 6 ’5. But, I show all of the qualities above and average look. I am always “SMILING” no matter what.
I ask my dates what you found attractive in me. I get one answer most “95%” of the time.
“You show CONFIDENCE. It glows on you “Bill”. “
August 18th, 2009 at 1:41 am
I also have most, if not all the qualities that Bill speaks of. It has taken years to build them up. In high school, I was standoffish and was about the last picked in sports during gym. I had girls that my sister was friends with that wondered why I never asked them out. Maturity had a lot to do with that.
Now, being 46 years old and having a few miles under my belt, and working out on a regular basis, I have learned a lot about myself. Unfortunately, my 9 year marriage will be ending soon due to many different issues, primarily not being compatible.
I agree with him that it is not all about looks, but they are important. I mean, what do us guys notice about the ladies…nice shiny hair, pretty eyes, nice build…and they initially look at us for handsome looks.
What really matters is that we are honest, nice, and know what we are after in life. Just as important, if you can’t hold a decent conversation, she will get bored. Same for her, if she has looks but cant tell you what year it is or who is president…it ain’t gonna go very far.
I also hear too much about us guys not keeping ourselves “presentable”. Come on fellas, a little soap and water, teeth whitener and a little cologne goes a long way. The clothes are just as important. Ditch the greased up jeans and ripped “T” shirts. Spend a few bucks and get something clean and descent to wear dudes.
September 21st, 2009 at 12:45 am
ok i am a girl and i like hot guys but its true would you date someone who is hot but is the most jerkest person you,ve ever met …. no right and i also say he doesn’t have to be horrible because there are some cute and nice guys out there but it is mostly for personalilty. so make the girl feel confortable because if she likes you she gets really nervous and tries to talk to you but she feels like she is gonna mess up GOOD LUCK …
January 18th, 2010 at 1:28 am
I do tend to agree with the article but I think also that what lends status to a man is often that he is surrounded by women even if there is absolutely nothing going on. When I was single every pretty woman I met was putting up her defenses just as soon as I was in her vicinity but as soon as I got married it seemed like women got very relaxed around me. Beautiful women talk to me all the time now. I am constantly surrounded by beautiful women. I don’t understand the attraction these women have for me but I suspect that it is because the more women a man is surrounded by the more status women perceive him to have. It may also be the confidence I get from my wife as well.
March 23rd, 2010 at 5:42 am
This certainly is a common subject for writers on the great obsession of our time – dating. But what do men see in women? Ladies want fun, adventurous men. Is this because many women lack these qualities. Women want men with style. But most of the great achievers in history had other things on their mind besides style. Women like funny, confident men. But men often like to hang out with other guys and make each other laugh. I don’t covet the role of a performer for an unfunny lady who’s preoccupied with… style.
Your article – and the zillions like it – says more about women than about men. If this is what they have to offer – I’d rather be snowboarding. Alone.
April 3rd, 2010 at 4:04 am
Being female, I’m going to say that the style part really isn’t that important: Yes, neat, non-baggy clothes is major. But reading fashion magazines is just weird. Don’t bother.
April 29th, 2010 at 12:22 am
I think that what women want varies from person to person, and from age groups to age groups. So I would say that the qualities above are pretty good ones that are probably good as a generalization of what women want. I mean, who wouldn’t want those qualities…this is why I say that more and more women are dating multiple people. You know who you are out there…it’s alright.
) You want all those qualities, but at times there are droughts and you can’t fine one man with all 6 qualities, so you might date 3 guys that each posses two of the qualities. BTW, I’m caring, sensitive, attractive, humorous, charming, hard working, sexy, tall, and I give a mean massage. Holla!
May 23rd, 2010 at 2:45 am
I am a man, and what I know is this. Women love money. Take a guy with an average look, nice clothes, nice wheels, good career, and intelligence will trump the really good looking guy with no money, no intelligence, crap car, and cheap clothes. I always heard money can’t buy love and friends, but they sure pay a lot of bills and make life a whole hell of a lot easier.
The other point is this. A woman loves a man that lets her dictate the household. Two things women want is money and power. The ability of calling the shots. If they don’t get their way, they withold sex as a weapon. I call that henpecked. Sorry guys that’s the way it is. If you don’t have those qualities, you are not going to get the top grade gals.
July 2nd, 2010 at 11:59 pm
I found myself smiling from head to toe after reading this article and the helpful comments.People like me consist of less than 1% of the population. I have a very rare personality type;INTJ. I contain qualities a-f and most are polished to near perfection.But most importantly, im not arrogant at all, i am very good at reading people, extremely intelligent for my age;17, and i have above average looks. I am a grade A+ and my message to anyone who reads this is that i didnt disagree with anything i read, furthermore and much more importantly; know yourself before you try to know others. Peace out peeps!!!
July 30th, 2010 at 6:13 am
nice article but ihave onley 2 notices in that matter first that girls are also human beings
that they can be different in their choice as example a girl might loves a so romantic person another will find him little boring second notice is that whatever u are dont try to attract someone as u will be such an actor believe in yourself and your girl will be your destiny ( thank for listenning to me waiting your comments )
November 3rd, 2010 at 3:54 pm
what if i don’t have sense of humor what to do
November 4th, 2010 at 9:16 am
@ahmed – humor is like every other skill in life. If you want to become funnier hang out with funny people, study improv or comedy.
November 6th, 2010 at 2:59 am
A little something off-topic from me.
Kinda fun what Jay C says
I quote:
“I contain qualities a-f and most are polished to near perfection.But most importantly, im not arrogant at all”
I really hope he ment it to be full on irony
November 12th, 2010 at 5:58 pm
totally correct
Most true part is Status
girls in high school prefer sports leaders
some girls go overcollege guys during her school days
No senior girl is going to date a junior guy
At college no fresh girl 101 will date a high school guy
During college girls would prefer older men a few classes ahead of them but not so rookies and freshman
At late college year 4 girls prefer professional men.
Once they become professional themselves with a full college degreee they don´t date college guys….
At work they date similar level of co – workers or the boss but not so the mail delivery guy of the company
If they work at a bar they prefer teh owner of the bar but if they own the bar themselves they don´t date the employee….
They like always more than what thye are in the social pyramid.
Sergio
March 5th, 2011 at 8:48 pm
I’ve always had different taste in guys. For me the list is:
1) Respect
2) Gentleman
3) Nice
4) Non perverted
5) Sense of humor
I hate guys who are disrespectful/perverted. I prefer cute guys over sexy guys and nice guys over bad boy guys.
April 21st, 2011 at 6:11 am
This is interesting, how woman like self confidence and status when they seem related don’t they ? and as for the excitement part i think everyones attracted to someone thats more exciting and having a good time than you currently are i mean we wake up eat breakfast thats boring we watch some tv it could be that terrbile ad on tv that makes you wanna vomit then you go out in life and someone you meets makes you laugh, think about something interesting or basically changes your whole mood it will affect you.
Now i think i know what the most attractive thing a man can do is be adventurous this does so many things its like your on a mission she can come if she doesn’t want to thats fine your still out in life on this mission it requires self confidence to do that.
And this fixes so many problems when your on a mission in life just to have fun get rid of time wasting people and have people in life with great quality you will become adventurous, fun, confident and interesting.
I’ve noticed i’ve just began this journey of the adventure known as my life and the girls i liked before are not as interesting as they once where i’m going out with girls who are not just good looking but have great qualities that i’m looking for..
its been great. and to think i’m only 15 my journey can always get better.